Remembrance/Armistice Day.

I've just finished reading an article about a ban on a Muslim extremist group that burned poppies on last years memorial day.

I am in no way intending to be racist with this post, I just want to state my views.

I just don't understand how they can be so disrespectful. If it wasn't for the people who died in that war for this country, as far as we know this country wouldn't be how it was today. Yet, they choose to live here, do they not? Don't protest something that is so much part of British culture and then complain about how this country 'treats' you if you're going to continue to live here. Even if these protesters were born in England, there is nothing stopping them moving to another country if they feel that this country is so terrible.

I just feel like if someone who was an extremist here, e.g the English Defence League, it would be dealt with in a more severe way in other countries.

Yes, we've banned the group. However, as I read in the aforementioned article, it is believe this group has just to continue to rename itself every time it has been banned.

Make a choice: live here, and respect the culture and the heritage, or move.

Seems simple to me.

I feel so stupid.

Seriously, this essay is doing my head in. I feel so stupid because I simply cannot fathom what to write. I have all my ideas, quotes and sources ready to go and I cannot put it all together to make a good essay. I always do it to myself. I overcomplicate things, then over-think them and then cannot write any ideas down even though I'm pretty sure that most of what I'm thinking is write because I've double checked with everyone else who is doing the same question as me.

I can write this blog no problem, I love writing. However, as soon as it comes to writing that I know is going to be assessed I stress myself out and I just cannot bring myself to write anything because I'm so scared of failing. Even though I've never failed anything before. I know I'm not stupid, but I make myself feel it so often that I'm not so sure now. It takes my brain a while to fully process concepts and while everyone else is happily writing away, I'm sat making plans and still trying to grasp the ideas.

:'(

Unnecessarily soppy post.

I love my boyfriend. I realise this more and more everyday. We've been together almost two years and I've never been happier. He's the boy that you see other people wishing they had.

He tells me I'm beautiful, gorgeous and sexy. He sends me lovely texts. He looks after me when I'm sick. He isn't afraid to tell people that I'm his girlfriend. He lets me cry on him. He makes me laugh when I can barely smile. He lets me rant. He pays attention when I'm talking about university work. He makes an effort with my family and friends. He spoils me. He never makes me do anything I don't want to. He's always there. He's proved himself trustworthy. He's one of a very small minority that I can open up to- if not the only person. He de-stresses me. He said he'd always wait for me. He said he wants to be with me forever and marry me.

He's my world.

I love him in a way that defies comprehension.

Society.

Some people today really make me question today's society.

Earlier today I was walking to the shop with my friend and there was a used pregnancy test just discarded on the street. I mean, really, what is wrong with people today? You wouldn't just leave a pregnancy test in the street, whether you were pregnant or not. I realise that not everyone is like this but some people seriously disgust me. Like I was in my shopping centre the other day and there was a used condom on the floor! It was awful.

What has happened to society? No one seems to care about anything any more. They don't care about themselves, other people or the world around them and it really irritates me sometimes.

I realise that, yes, sometimes I don't care about what people think about me but some people are just oblivious to rules and norms. It's worrying. People who don't have a job, nor ever seem to want one. How can they function, I don't know what if I didn't have the prospect of a future or something to do in life. I realise they get money for nothing but it's almost like they don't have a purpose in life. How can you be ok with that?

Sorry for this rant; all caused by a used pregnancy test!

Budapest aftermath...

So, I'm back from Budapest. I had a really good time, despite thinking that I probably wouldn't enjoy it.

We walked a ridiculous amount of miles. We saw the Palace, Parliament buildings, St. Stephen's Basilica and went to The House of Terror. It was all really interesting, but The House of Terror freaked me out a little bit. Well, it'd freak you out knowing you'd been in a house where thousands of Hungarians had been tortured and killed during Nazi and Soviet Union occupation. Yeah, very creepy.

What else?

Oh we went to Széchenyi baths. It's like a natural spring thing. I went into the sauna and actually burnt my feet on the floor, that was awful. I also had to buy a hideous swimming costume because I forgot to take one because I wasn't originally planning on going. It was awful, so unflattering so I felt even worse than I would've done if I'd taken one of my own. The bath's stunk inside because of the sulphur. If I was more hungover I would've vommed!

Oh yes, the night before I was absolutely hammered. I had a dance off and threw up in the club's toilets. I'm a classy bird I know. It's not my fault; red wine is the devil. It was so good to get away. Me and John had some lovely moments and I loved every second with him.

The only thing I didn't like was the lack of sleep, my feet hurting and the flights. Other than that, it was all good.

I'm 20 now, how bizarre.

Yes, as the title states I turned 20 not so long ago. 25 days to be exact. It's not that much different from being 19, except I'm no longer a teenager and suddenly feel compelled to start using a more sophisticated vocabulary. I always feel like it's expected of me anyway, because I'm an English Language student. So yes, I'm now in my second year at university and I'm enjoying it far more. I got to pick the modules that I wanted to do and I also don't have to live with such infuriating housemates. Well, one of my housemates is still quite annoying, but I don't really want to talk about it, as it will cause this whole post to spiral off topic.

Me and John are still together, 22 months and going strong. He makes me so happy, even if he doesn't always feel like he does. We're actually off to Budapest on Thursday with some of his friends. I'm not sure if I'm looking forward to it or not though. As bad as it sounds, I don't actually like all his friends.

What else have I got to tell you? Oh yes, my brother and his girlfriend have moved to the Cayman Islands in the Caribbean and we went out to see him in June. It was the best holiday I've ever had. They live in pure paradise. It's amazing. I went snorkelling (properly) for the first time and saw a ridiculous amount of fish I never thought I'd see. I also went and saw some Stingrays. I got to feed them and I also kissed one. It was a strange experience, I must admit, but how many people can say they've done that?

You can't say that you're not jealous of that.

Anyway, yes, not much else to discuss for now. Therefore, I shall sign off for the time being.

:)

you're the sparkle in my life.

I have so much to tell you since i last wrote.
well for one, I've started university. UCLan ftw. I didn't get into my first choice but I'm kinda glad cos I've met KATHEH and BECKEH who are amazeeee. I love my course too apart from English Language Workshop, it's a load of bollocks.

What else. Well, John and me have been together almost a year now :) (11 months today actually :D ) hehe. I love him more than ever. Although, being away from him is so hard lately. It didn't seem this bad at the beginning of the year but it's horrible. I went from seeing him every day to seeing him like every three weeks or something like that. I miss him like crazy but absence really does make the heart grow fonder. We still talk every day even though when I came to uni he said we didn't have to, but i knew we would it get withdrawal symptoms if I don't speak to him. I never thought I'd feel like this about anyone to be honest. He's completely changed my outlook on life and he's my world. I love him soooo much :)

Our Joe's moved to the Cayman Island's so I don't get to see him much anymore either, it's only a two year contract though so it's all good. I just miss him sometimes and the ability to text him without it costing me like 50p a time, well I say costing me, my dad pays my phone bill so technically I don't pay it haha.

I best get off, supposed to be going shopping soon, peace out people :)
xx